july1, '06 1:06pm
well technically it was night time. and i was dreaming but not yet asleep. so i guess you just call that something like imagining or thinking. although dreaming sounds so much nicer. and that's the reason why i had the hardest time sleeping. i just kept tossing and turning while dreaming of something i have always wanted to happen. but i wouldn't get much into details.
i hear champagne glasses clicking. i hear people talking to each other. i also hear a song, my favorite song, on the piano. and then, a flash of light, a spotlight, somewhat blinding. people clapping and then silence. then there i am. i see myself, so dressed up in a white dress filled with blue designs and my hair in curls, walking down a flight of stairs with a long red carpet and am really afraid that i might lose my grip and trip, then, fall down the flight of stairs. i feel really nervous but i am still smiling as i look on down to see who would be awaiting me at the end of the stairs, i see faces. i see very familiar faces offering their hands to me, one is holding a bouquet of roses and the other a bouquet of lilies, and i had to choose which one to actually hold on to. then i see all other people looking on as i still walk on the red carpet to where i shall sit myself. i look around to see familiar faces smiling back at me, wishing me all the best. then i recognize the faces of all my friends, looking so beautiful and dashing in their evening gowns and coat and ties. then let's fast forward to the part i have the last dance of the night. all i had to do was choose between the first two very familiar faces that were offering their hands to me earlier. everything depended on who i would choose. why? i just don't know. so here i was. i started walking towards them. and then...
welcome back to reality.
why i decided to end a wonderful faiytale? no idea. if you know why, please tell me.
so well, we've just settled to our new home away from home. it's nice. it's not actually a house. but it's nice and spacious. it's got this nice view of River Thames and i do have a small balcony in my room. just lovely. i a nice bathroom. big enough for me. it's still summer here and it's actually getting warm. love it.
[currently thinking: blag blag blag kaboom disappear!]
[july1, 8:06pm - Phil. time]